If there's one thing about us humans I will always find
fascinating, it's our ability to justify the most bizarre things we do.
Case in point, on our first full day in Rome, Tash and I watched at
least a hundred people, if not more, line up to throw coins into a
fountain that wasn't there.
We started the day with a map marked with every site we
wanted to see, and we set out on part one of our self-guided
Roman Holiday walking tour - retracing the steps of Audrey Hepburn and
Gregory Peck in one of Tash's favourite movies - which, I admit, I only
watched for the first time 2 nights before.
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| Selfie at the Colosseum - taken by hand, with scaffolding in the background. Both of those will make sense in a moment. |
These men stroll fearlessly through the crowds of tourists, thrusting extendable selfie sticks at anyone who looks like they might even possibly own a camera or a phone. After only a few days in Rome, we've found them at every single famous site, their cries of "Selfie selfie selfie!" forming the harmony to the music of the city.
After ages spent gazing up at the ancient architecture in wonder, we cast our eyes towards the ticket booth, and noticed the 2-3 hour queue for admission. We
decided to come back tomorrow.
Our path then took us past the Vittoriano, a monument dedicated to the first king of Italy which, at 90 years old, is by far the newest site on our trail...
...and the Pantheon. Originally an Ancient Roman temple, the Pantheon was converted into a Catholic church, but is open to the public. If you do decide to go in, however, you should be silent, as it's a sacred space. Don't worry if you forget, though, as they'll remind you to be silent... in 6 different languages... over a loudspeaker... every few seconds.
Our path then took us past the Vittoriano, a monument dedicated to the first king of Italy which, at 90 years old, is by far the newest site on our trail...
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| Which, okay, isn't in the movie, but it's still really pretty! |
...and the Pantheon. Originally an Ancient Roman temple, the Pantheon was converted into a Catholic church, but is open to the public. If you do decide to go in, however, you should be silent, as it's a sacred space. Don't worry if you forget, though, as they'll remind you to be silent... in 6 different languages... over a loudspeaker... every few seconds.
Finally, our wanderings brought us to one of the most iconic
locations in all of Rome - the Trevi Fountain, which has been featured
in films for almost as long as there have been films.
At this stage, I should let you guys in on something that has become something of a running joke whenever Tash and I visit a famous monument - it will, invariably, be covered in scaffolding. This is largely our own fault - we try to avoid crowds of tourists by travelling during the off-seasons, and that's usually when any restoration works happen. We try to cut it out of our photos as much as possible, but it's always there.
Trevi Fountain was no exception - the scaffolding was there. Only problem is, the fountain wasn't.
At this stage, I should let you guys in on something that has become something of a running joke whenever Tash and I visit a famous monument - it will, invariably, be covered in scaffolding. This is largely our own fault - we try to avoid crowds of tourists by travelling during the off-seasons, and that's usually when any restoration works happen. We try to cut it out of our photos as much as possible, but it's always there.
Trevi Fountain was no exception - the scaffolding was there. Only problem is, the fountain wasn't.
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| The iconic Trevi Fountain. Not pictured: the iconic Trevi Fountain. |
When we got to the Piazza di Trevi, we honestly had no idea
what we were looking at. Huge plexiglass barricades had been erected,
and virtually all of the fountain's famous statues, sculptures - and,
y'know, water - were missing. All that was left were a few statues
wrapped in protective plastic, and a metal walkway across what was,
essentially, a stone hole in the ground.
And yet, still, the tourists came in droves, queueing up by the dozens to go out across the walkway, toss a coin into where the fountain would have been, and then leave. It was one of the most perplexing scenes I've ever witnessed, punctuated when I overheard an American man tell his wife, "Look, we've come all this way to throw a coin in the fountain, so we will dammit!"
And yet, still, the tourists came in droves, queueing up by the dozens to go out across the walkway, toss a coin into where the fountain would have been, and then leave. It was one of the most perplexing scenes I've ever witnessed, punctuated when I overheard an American man tell his wife, "Look, we've come all this way to throw a coin in the fountain, so we will dammit!"
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| The queue for the fountain that was...not...there! |
It's absurd, sure, but there's some part of me that can't
help but see the logic in the idea. People (us included!) had come
halfway around the world, further and faster than humans have been able
to travel for virtually all of our species' existence.
We'd come to the Trevi Fountain to be part of a tradition that stretches back at least three times as long as any of them have been alive, and for no reason other than because someone else did it first. In the face of such overwhelming absurdity, why should a simple thing like the absence of the fountain itself stop anyone?
Unanimously, we opted
to keep our coins to ourselves. We took our photos, marveled in the
absurdity, then left the tourists and the ever-present selfie stick men behind.
Amused and exhausted after a long day on our feet, we headed back home, stopping
for dinner in a little local place.
The restaurant, for the record, is amazing. We feasted like meager kings, like serfs on banquet day, on bruschetta, enormous plates of freshly-made pasta, and tortino al cioccolato (Tasha's new favourite words), and walked away with change from 35 Euro. But fate, however, wasn't quite done with our absurdity for the night.
We'd come to the Trevi Fountain to be part of a tradition that stretches back at least three times as long as any of them have been alive, and for no reason other than because someone else did it first. In the face of such overwhelming absurdity, why should a simple thing like the absence of the fountain itself stop anyone?
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| To be fair, they did keep a small pool of water for throwing coins into. Not that most people noticed. |
The restaurant, for the record, is amazing. We feasted like meager kings, like serfs on banquet day, on bruschetta, enormous plates of freshly-made pasta, and tortino al cioccolato (Tasha's new favourite words), and walked away with change from 35 Euro. But fate, however, wasn't quite done with our absurdity for the night.
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| And I don't mean catching two centurions in full battle armour chowing down on calzones! |
In the corner of the restaurant was a TV, playing what has
to be the single most bizarre game show we have ever seen (and we've watched South East Asian television!). There was a
man who was clearly the host, people that I assume were contestants
despite the fact that they never actually did anything, and random people costumed as various supernatural creatures.
Yes, really. At seemingly random intervals, everyone in the studio including the audience, would hold their hands up like crab claws, and a man in a terrible costume would enter for apparently no other reason than to harass the contestant. While we were watching, he came in as a vampire, a ghost (in a white sheet with eye holes cut out), and an over-excited fairy godmother. That last costume, incidentally, consisted of a wig, sparkling ballet slippers, tutu and leotard which didn't even try to cover the guy's sprawling beard and body hair.
Yes, really. At seemingly random intervals, everyone in the studio including the audience, would hold their hands up like crab claws, and a man in a terrible costume would enter for apparently no other reason than to harass the contestant. While we were watching, he came in as a vampire, a ghost (in a white sheet with eye holes cut out), and an over-excited fairy godmother. That last costume, incidentally, consisted of a wig, sparkling ballet slippers, tutu and leotard which didn't even try to cover the guy's sprawling beard and body hair.
I wish I could say one of the many contestants won, but I
honestly don't know if they were competing with each other, or even
playing at all. It was one of the most bizarre, confusing, and
alarming things either Tash or I have seen in a very long time, and
neither of us could look away.
If you'd like to read more of our 5 days in Rome, click here!  |
| No more! Please! No more hairy men in tutus! |
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