Spare me your Judgements and Spare me your Dreams

by Tasha in Epigrams and Interludes, Couch Surfing, Pre-trip

Do you ever find yourself listening to a particular song, visiting a particular place or meeting a particular person who invokes a particular thought, which permeates and leads you to question everything around you, the world through your eyes?

Everything you see, everything you think, everything you experience? The practical term of which would be considered an epiphany, however it appears to go deeper right down to the core of what in fact makes you you. If this experience seems familiar to you, congratulations, you have been on the receiving end of a dramatic adjustment to your world view.

I first learned of the concept of a world view in secondary school where on the odd productive day, we lent our ears to the idea that the way we view the world is biased by our previous experience, our background, and our environment. That the way we live, the way we were raised and the way we think jades our understanding of the world. None of us is immune to seeing the world subjectified by our own brains. 

Now many of us might say, "Hey, I am not a judgemental person. I am not racist or sexist or ageist.  I try to walk the road of life in another’s shoes and see through their eyes.” And let’s be clear, this is not saying that having a world view (which all of us inherently have) makes us fundamentally racist (etc.) or judgemental, merely that it is impossible to walk the road in another’s shoes. 

You can’t see where they’ve walked before, or how those walks have formed them into the person they are today. We can learn from each other, and change our view to incorporate new ideas, but rather than replace our old ideas, they will merge to make a new and different you. The things you see, the things you experience, can change you in ways that make you see the world in a whole new way.

photo by: quattrostagioni

I know in the past I’ve spoken about the delightful cultural differences you see by immersing yourself in a new culture, or helping another immerse themselves in your own. And of course this affects the way you see the world, but many people don’t even look to the person beside them, or the person beside that person, to see the little but fundamental differences that make us different from each other.

Personally, I felt it happen last week, while I was trying desperately to explain the concept of Couch Surfing with one of my co-workers. She could not understand why I would let a (virtual) stranger into my house, especially for no tangible gain. I tried to explain the online community, the idea of giving back, and how you can converse before you actually meet. And as I explained this I realised she was right. No matter how you look at it, I am letting strangers stay on my couch and eat my food. I give them advice, show them around the city and all for no monetary gain. (Note: that is not to say that there aren’t very generous people in the world – but more no expectation of gain)

This, to a person who sees their home as a shelter or sanctum, or was brought up to mistrust strangers or that life is tit for tat (a constant back and forward equal exchange), would indeed seem a ridiculous notion. However coming from my own world view, I simply see that the chance of meeting really interesting people, forming international friendships, gaining useful insights and paying forward to the day that I may rely on the kindness of strangers far outweighs any uncertainty or unease I may have over what could possibly go wrong.

photo by: whl travel

Although there are definitely experiences in my past I wish had gone a different way. I am thankful for the things that have gone wrong, the mistakes I have made, the great things I have stumbled into, the way I was raised, the people I have met and the man I love for making me the person that I am. My world view is constantly changing, but that doesn’t mean I shouldn’t try to keep understanding and learn as much as I can. I don’t think any world view is the right one. I don’t believe there are inherently bad, or wrong views or inherently evil ones.

I do believe, however, we should all try to listen and understand as many views and opinions as possible. Even ones you don’t agree with. It doesn’t matter if it’s regarding touchy subjects such as religion, sexuality, politics, literature, there are lots of different views of these issues out there, and even if you don’t agree with them, the best thing for any of us to do is open our minds to someone else’s view.

And in a nutshell, this is why I want to travel. I want to hear as many views as possible, to see both beautiful and heartbreaking sights. To understand why people believe what they do. To eat foods I've never heard of and may not like, but I’ll try them anyway, because it all goes into making me the person I want to be.

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